


Not So Alone

by hana_pouter



Category: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-06
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-03-14 15:07:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13592661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hana_pouter/pseuds/hana_pouter
Summary: Midge has heard about what happened between Susie and Joel at the Gaslight the night of the Lenny Bruce performance and she is PISSED.





	Not So Alone

“Susie!”

Midge strode into the gaslight wearing an elegant green dress and matching heels. She was as beautiful as ever, and also completely livid.

“Uh-oh,” said Susie, who was behind the bar, wearing her usual hat and leather jacket. She wasn't at all beautiful, but she preferred it that way. She braced herself for impact.

Midge slammed her purse on the bar.

“Hi, Midge,” said Susie.

“I need to talk to you,” she said. “Now.”

“Okay, what's up?”

“Not here. I want to speak in private.”

Susie scoffed. “Nowhere in the Gaslight is private. We don't even have a back room for employees.”

“We'll use the toilets then,” said Midge, matter-of-factly.

“Are you out of your _mind_?” asked Susie. “You know what our toilets are like!”

“Right now I don't care. Come on.” Midge grabbed Susie's arm and pulled her out from behind the bar and towards the bathroom. A man was just reaching for the handle when Midge pushed past him and opened the door.

“Hey!” shouted the man.

“You're just gonna have to wait your turn, buddy,” said Susie as she was pulled past him and into the bathroom.

The bathroom was, in fact, disgusting. The Gaslight employees did their best (sort of) to keep it clean, but it was old, and beat-up, and foul. And small. There was barely room for Midge and Susie to both stand upright, and they were nearly touching each other. Susie was a little freaked out by the intimacy of the setting, and she still didn't know what this was about.

Midge had her arms folded in front of her and was giving Susie a piercing glare.

“I talked to Joel today,” said Midge.

Now Susie knew what this was about.

“You know he's been avoiding me?” Midge continued. “That's right. We had sex, I performed for Lenny Bruce, we were going to get back together, my family was going to be whole, and my career was on the up again. I was riding high, and then Joel just wouldn't talk to me. For weeks. I finally managed to corner him at his office today, and do you know what he said to me?”

“Darling, I'm sorry, I've been a fool, please have all of my money to make up for it?” suggested Susie.

“I asked him why he was avoiding me and _he_ told _me_ to talk to _you_ ,” said Midge with an air of finality. “Well?”

“Okay,” said Susie. “So he was here the night of the Lenny Bruce performance.”

“Oh no,” said Midge.

“Oh yes,” said Susie. “And he started yelling at _me_ about how _I_ was destroying _your_ family by _making_ you get up there and say those things! So yeah, I told him off. I told him that you're talented and you're going to have a brilliant career and you deserve better than scum like him. Because it's true. And if _he's_ finally seen that, then I say good for him.”

“I was so _close_ , Susie!”

“So close to what?” asked Susie. “Going back to killing yourself trying to maintain the perfect life? Spending every second of every day trying to fit yourself into some perfect housewife jello-mold you ordered from a catalogue? You're better than that, Midge!”

Midge was silent for a moment. She took a deep breath. “I just don't get it. I mean, I get defending yourself, but why did you have to be so _mean_ to him? I don't even understand why you care so much! It's my life! I'm not an idiot. I know what kind of person Joel is, but if I want to keep making the same mistakes, that's my business. And it's better for you that way, anyway! It just gives me more to talk about in my act. So why, huh? Why do you care so much about my personal life?”

“Because I like you!” said Susie.

There was another brief pause during which the two friends locked eyes, the air full of some incomprehensible emotion between them. Then Midge bent over slightly and kissed Susie on the lips, and  Susie, after a moment's confusion, kissed her back.

Then Midge pulled away. “You _are_ a lesbian, right?” she asked. “You like women? I wasn't reading that wrong?"

“No, no,” said Susie. “You were right. I'm definitely a lesbian. Although, when I said I _liked_ you just now I mostly meant it platonically, but... I mean, if you're into this, I _definitely_ am. Into this.”

“Good,” said Midge, grabbing Susie's face with both hands and kissing her again. Hesitantly, Susie brought her hands up to rest around Midge's waist. Midge pushed her against the bathroom door and deepened the kiss.

“Wait, wait,” said Susie, pushing Midge back a little. “Listen, I'm _so_ happy that you want to do this, and if you change your mind I'm probably going to hate myself forever, but I really, _really_ don't want to do this in the Gaslight's bathroom. Please.”

“No, you're right,” said Midge, glancing around. “It's disgusting in here. We'll have to go back to your place.”

“My place?” said Susie. “My place isn't much better. Besides, you _hate_ my place!”

“It's private and it has a bed,” said Midge, giving Susie a sardonic smile. “Even if you do have to pull it out of the wall. _I'm_ still living with my parents. Do you really want to sneak into my room through the fire escape?”

“My place it is,” said Susie.

 

Susie was nervous bringing Midge into her room, but all of Midge's earlier anger had been replaced with what seemed like genuine excitement.

“You're sure you want to do this?” asked Susie.

“Oh, just set up the bed already,” said Midge, already slipping out of her dress.

Susie pulled down the bed and when she turned back around, Midge was already out of her dress, undoing her bra behind her back. She let the bra fall and then turned around. Susie gave a low whistle. “I forgot how gorgeous those are.”

Midge smiled and stepped towards Susie, holding up her own breasts to show them off. “You can touch them if you want.”

“Don't mind if I do,” said Susie, and they began making out again. Susie sat down on the bed, and Midge straddled her while they kissed, Susie tentatively groping her perfect breasts.

Midge broke the kiss. “Aren't you gonna get naked, too?”

“Oh yeah,” said Susie, in a daze.

Midge climbed off of Susie and laid back in the bed, showing off, while Susie shed her jacket and began unbuttoning her shirt.

“So how do two women have sex anyway?” asked Midge, playfully poking Susie with her toe.

“All sorts of ways,” said Susie. She smiled suggestively. “You ever been eaten out?”

“Yeah,” said Midge.

This gave Susie pause. “Really?” she said. “ _Joel_ ate you out?”

“Hey, I'm a strong woman,” said Midge. “I know how to get what I want in bed.”

“Oh, well,” said Susie, staring off into the distance, haunted by the image. Then she came back to the moment. “I bet I'm better at it than he is.”

Midge sat up and put one arm around Susie's neck, drawing her into another long kiss, Susie's shirt still hanging half-buttoned. Then Midge put her mouth next to Susie's ear and whispered, “Prove it.”

Susie shivered. “Yes ma'am,” she said.

Midge lay back down and Susie straddled her, kissing her on the lips. Then Susie kissed Midge's neck, and then her tits, spending some time on each nipple as Midge moaned and writhed underneath her. Then she went lower still.

Midge gasped as Susie found her mark, pushing her hips up into Susie's face. “Oh, that's good,” said Midge, reaching her hands down to run her fingers through Susie's hair. “Oh, yes. Oh, Susie, I want you inside of me.” Susie obediently added a finger. Midge continued to buck her hips as Susie licked, and sucked, and fingered her towards orgasm. She gasped a third time as she came, and Susie continuing to lick her through the aftershocks. Then she hummed, pleased, as she pulled Susie up for another kiss.

“You _are_ better than Joel,” she said.

“Thank you,” said Susie, wiping tears away from her eyes.

Midge sat up quickly. “Wait, are you crying?”

“You're just so beautiful,” said Susie, sniffing. “And it's been along time. I'm fine. I'm fine.”

Midge pulled her into another kiss. “Are you really okay?” she asked, caressing Susie's cheek.

“I'm fine,” said Susie, certainly. “I'm happier than I've been in a long time.”

“But you're still not naked,” Midge said, with a joking pout. “I want you naked.”

Susie was, indeed, still wearing her half-buttoned shirt. She quickly shed her clothes, and this time it was Midge's turn to whistle. “You are beautiful,” said Midge.

“Oh, stop,” said Susie, rolling her eyes.

“No, I mean it,” said Midge, crawling across the bed to be closer to Susie. “I mean, look at these honkers!” Midge grabbed Susie's breasts and gave them a squeeze.

“Stop it!” said Susie, laughing and swatting her hands away.

“So what are we going to do next?” asked Midge, raising an eyebrow.

“I am going to teach you about something called scissoring,” said Susie, brushing some of Midge's hair away from her face.

“Ooh,” said Midge. “How do you do that?”

“You just spread your legs and let me do the work,” said Susie.

“Oh, so just like sex with a man, then,” said Midge, smiling.

Susie laughed again. “Not quite.”

 

Afterwards, they lay together under Susie's covers, Midge cuddled up against Susie's side, Susie's arm around her. “Oh, shit,” said Midge.

“What is it?” asked Susie.

“I just realized I can't joke about this,” said Midge. “I can't put it in my act, I mean.”

“Thank goodness. I mean, it might go over surprisingly well in the Village, but it's not exactly mainstream material. But also I'm not sure my fragile ego could take it.”

Midge snorted, propping herself up on one arm to get a better look at Susie. “You? A fragile ego? Yeah, right.”

“You'd be surprised,” said Susie, meeting Midge's gaze, her eyes pleading.

“What's wrong?” asked Midge, frowning. “Oh no, was this not good for you? Did you want a more active partner? I'm sorry, I'm still not really experienced with this, but if you tell me what I did wrong, I'm sure I can fix my technique.”

“It's not that,” said Susie. “You were fantastic. The best I've ever had. I just. . . what is this for you?”

“What do you mean?”

“I'm not stupid,” said Susie. “I know what the world is. Sex is easy, but relationships are hard, especially between women, and I just. . . I can't stand being used anymore. You know that it's been years since I've been with anyone like this? You wanna know why? It's because I got sick of having sex with women and being the only one who got emotionally attached.”

Midge smirked. “Are you saying you're attached to me?”

Susie sat up. “Midge, please,” she said. “I'm being serious here. I need to know you're not just using me to get over Joel.”

Midge also sat up. She threw her arms out to the side, dismissively.

“Midge,” said Susie.

“Okay, Okay, I get it.” Midge took a deep breath. “It's just hard for me to be this, you know, open about my feelings.”

“You're pretty open about your feelings on stage,” said Susie.

Midge waved a hand dismissively. “That's jokes. That's not the same thing.”

“Well, I can wait,” said Susie. “I have all night.”

“It's almost morning already,” said Midge.

“I have all morning,” said Susie.

Midge sighed. “I realized something, recently.”

“What's that?”

“I was really happy about maybe getting back together with Joel, but it wasn't about _Joel_. It was about the life we shared together. About getting back to that place where I felt like the world was right, like _I_   was right. Ever since he left, my entire idea of myself has had to change, and that's been hard. And one of the hardest parts is realizing that. . . maybe I don't actually care about Joel that much. I don't really love him, I just love the _idea_ of him.”

“Okay,” said Susie.

“But with you,” Midge looked down and took Susie's hand in hers. “When we got in that fight a while back, I was devastated. Not because of an idea you represent, or because of any sense-of-self you could give me, but just because I like you. And I couldn't stand the idea of you not liking me.”

Susie put a hand under Midge's chin and brought her face up so she could see her eyes. “Are you crying” asked Susie.

Midge sniffed, wiping away her tears. “I don't know what this is yet,” said Midge. “But I just want you to know that you're not the only one here who's emotionally attached.”

“That's enough for me,” said Susie, pulling Midge into a kiss.

Midge smiled. “Hey, if this works out, you won't have to hire that German broad to walk you around the park in your old age.”

“Oh, come on! That's my one dream!” said Susie. “Don't take that away from me!”

“Alright,” said Midge. “She can walk us both around.”

“Now _that_ sounds perfect,” said Susie, smiling. "Also it'll be cheaper if we're both paying her salary."

"Good point," said Midge. "Very practical. Now let's get some sleep. I have to pick up the kids in the morning."

"Do you think your kids would ever call me dad?" asked Susie.

"Don't push it," said Midge. "Although I'm sure you'd be a better dad than Joel."

Susie scoffed. "That's not a very high bar."

"Shut up," said Midge.

"Shutting up," said Susie. 

 


End file.
